lack of attraction - Love Forum - Online Relationship Discussion

I'm in a relationship for almost a year and a half.
I love my GF and she loves me. However, from a very early stage I feel almost no attraction, and sex doesn?t come easily and isn't as fulfilling as it should.

My GF is 29 yo and I am 34 yo. I do want to get married and have a bit more than one or two kids (probably 4-5, if it works we cannot control what g-d upstairs have in store for us), so the age of me and my now or any future GF is a factor. I feel discouraged from both the possibility of hurting my GF, I cannot see her hurt, and whenever things didn?t work or the option of break up came, I fell apart with her. Also, the option of starting over at this relatively late stage is rather discouraging.

There are some things in which we are compatible and lots of warmth, understanding and taking the good with the bad. Some things are not perfect, not ideal and in some aspects we go on different directions or a bit stuck for some time, maybe because of the relationship and maybe because of the indecision. However, we see the family cell and its workings very similarly.
I had the problem of previously finding good girls which I am not very attracted to before, but not to the extent I'm experiencing now, or at least I broke those kind of relationships pretty early. It is possible for me to be very sexually driven. However, whether I unconsciously ruin it for myself when a potentially good spouses arrive or choosing from the beginning incompatible matches for serious relationships, I cannot honestly say for sure.

There are always interested third parties, but for several month now I have shut them down, although I flirted a little bit before, due to insecurity in the relationship and my wish to see if it is a physical issue or inside this relationship issue. Now I know I can still be very attracted to other women. I didn't however sleep with other women, though explicit offers were given. I do not want to cheat and even the flirting felt like cheating to me, for however good or bad reasons.

My GF is sexually interested, although I shut her down a bit, not intentionally.
She wants to get married and the offer was open for some time. I also want marriage, but am afraid of entering into an unsatisfying long term relationship and also hurting her continually.

Can it get much better after marriage if the pressure of deciding is already off the table and we are sexual to a normal extent?
Is there a chance for a good but not very sexual relationship?
Can there be a relationship without much attraction?

Source: http://www.loveforum.net/threads/77450-lack-of-attraction

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